With all the positive vibes circulating around the internet of queer culture—like the couple who proposed at the same time, the gay twins who act as wing men, and actress Annette Bening’s positive messages to her son Stephen—it’s sometimes easy, and hard to recognize, that not everyone is so loving and accepting of the LGBTQ+ community.
In a recent tweet, Kate, a lesbian woman, showed her love to her new fiancé, Brooke, with several paragraphs, poetically and beautifully wr
itten, that would make even the most poker-faced person break into a smile and a loud sob.
While the post to her fiancé Brooke served as an admiration of their love for one another, it also served as a beacon of courage. Coming from a home where much of her family disapproves of her sexuality and openness to love, Kate explained to Pink News that the post was also a message to her homophobic family; a message of unconditional self-love.
“For some of my family members,” Kate explained, “religious views as well as a lack of recognizing that the world is not binary and fearing that realization really inhibits their ability to be supportive, loving and respectful”
She went on to say, “I shared it because I feel really firmly about not allowing anyone to discredit my love, my relationship and my engagement.” And that’s exactly what homophobes do when they “disagree” with LGBTQ+ peoples’ sexuality—they deny them the right to pursue happiness and love; they deny that their love is real, and, in a way, make LGBTQ+ feel less than human.
I admit, Kate’s message made me tear up, especially those gorgeously written paragraphs. When I officially came out to old childhood friends and much of my family, I decided to do it in a Valentine’s Day post dedicated to my boyfriend. I figured, everyone else is doing it, so why can’t I? I was nervous, especially since much of my family didn’t know; and I really didn’t know how they’d react. But I was so in love with him and excited that, for the first time in my life, I was dating a man who I wasn’t anxious to be with or scared of the future. I was, and still do, feel comfortable and safe and, most importantly, HAPPY. I couldn’t contain myself. If people had an issue with my sexuality and who I loved, who cares? I was happy. And, as Kate put it, “I’ll be damned if I don’t celebrate her and our love from the rooftops.” Luckily, I had support from all my family and friends.
But Kate’s most important message was when she explained that ‘family’ should not “bind you to a relationship with a person who doesn’t support, respect, and love you in the way that all people deserve.” Indeed, this is a reality that many queer people face—that one day your family may not love you unconditionally for who you are like they say. But how liberating is it to create a family with the friends you love and the person of your dreams, and to eventually find a sense of home in your queer identity.
You can read the whole story here, at Pink News: https://www.pinknews.co.uk/2019/11/28/marriage-engagement-twitter-facebook-viral-lesbian-woman-homophobic-family/